Bismillah

Insha’Allah, I am coming back to the mid-west , to Ann Arbor, MI for my “Be Exceptional” sisters only DiscoverU Power Workshop. And I am psyched!

To get more details about the event visit and to register visit : www.discoveruevents.com .

Date: May 30th

Location: University of Ann Arbor

Testimonials from the last Be Exceptional Workshop in California.

“Instead of making projects, goals so daunting, after the workshop it makes you believe in your personal capabilities to achieve a natural God given asset…that you are NOT over estimating your capabilities!” – Lubna S. – Mission Viejo, CA

“Megan is an amazing speaker and she’s been blessed with the quality of public speaking which I find many Muslim women lack – so we should take advantage of her abilities! ” Sarah S. – Fullerton, CA

“My outlook is (now) more concrete. I know how to approach my problems with other people. I am definitely more confident in who I am..” Mariam A. – Irvine, CA

“If your feeling unaccomplished, if you need a life boost, then the money spent is worth every penny!” Anita B.- Fullerton, CA

“I have more confidence, more directioon in life as to accomplishments and achievements I plan to do insha’Allah. I’m going to go home and clean my room, study more, and pray Qiyam tonight and thank Allah for blessing me ” Sarah S. – Fullerton, CA

Bismillah

“Islam feels so hard to practice. I feel no matter how hard I try, I am going to be the people of Jahannum. It is so hard to be strong in high school…..”

“I really liked how you said that worship could be be going to the gym or doing homework…I have never heard that before…”

“I really am the person you described. I don’t believe in myself at all. How can I change that now….”

“You have really inspired me! I didn’t know that there is a career for Muslims who do what you do. I had cancer last year, and I now speak to people  who are diagnosed with cancer.  Is there a way for me to do that for Muslims….”

” I am in the category you described – people only motivated by money. I don’t want to have to ever ever rely on any man for money. This way I am always taken care of…… “

” I loved the exercise, but how can I ever figure out how to make this happen…”

“Your workshop was so inspiring! I never thought about all of this before……”

(comments from students)

I recently had the opportunity last Saturday to speak at UCLA’s Muslim College day, a program for Muslim high school students intended to offer them guidance, preparation, mentoring and inspiration for college. The event lasted all day, and I have to say I was impressed by the number of activities and workshops provided for the students, all developed and organized by the UCLA Muslim Student’s Association.

I did a workshop which geared towards helping the students clarify what they are passionate about and what inspires them. With this clarity, we formed a purpose statement.  As I spoke I wondered what was going through their heads. Was I reaching them, were they inspired?

After my workshop was finished, immediately a young brother came up to me with questions.  Soon after young sisters approached me with questions. Then there were 3 girls in the bathroom, outside at lunch, out in the courtyard. Every 10-15 minutes a different set of students approached me. Alhamdulellah, the workshop had gotten them interested and raised many questions for them.

As a youth speaker and mentor, I have always worked hard to present to the youth the fears and concerns I know they have inside of them before they have to ask. I want to create an environment where they feel validated, understood, and feel safe to express their deepest concerns and questions. Today’s Muslim youth are taught to think independently and challenge everything  based on the style of learning in the present educational system and the social environment that surrounds it; to formulate their own opinions and lifestyle. If we want to reach them and keep them close to the Deen, our methods of communication and presentation must peak their interest, and keeping the interest of an auditorium of Muslim youth who have enough electronic gadgets on them to entertain my children for a week straight is no small feat!

What I learned was that the same questions I ask adults, the same tools and exercises I do in my coaching is as needed if not more needed with our youth. And here is why.

There was 15 Mohammad* – who has a fear of failure in the Deen. He fears he will never make it to being a student of knowledge. He feels like he should give up.  What could be the result if that fear is left unchecked……how would it grow? Develop? Get stronger?

How about 17 year old Anisa* – who outwardly is beautiful, well spoken and I imagine makes friends easily, but feels she is not capable of working towards her dreams, who believes she isn’t good enough. What could be the results of this belief over the years….

There is 14 year old Ameena* – who is shy and lacks confidence in making friends and trying new activities, limiting herself from new experiences and happiness. How might this effect her decisions over the years….

In each scenario the following statement applies ” Practice does not make perfect, it makes permanence.” The more we “practice” certain behaviors, the stronger they become, and the pattern of results happens over and over again. As a coach, I help people attain those light bulb moments where they finally understand what has held them back all these years from true success in their lives. Most adults go back to a memory in their teenagers years where a negative belief or pattern begun.

Imagine if it could have been discovered then. And conquered then.

As one of the youth mentors there said in her email to me “I just wanted to express to you again how much I loved your presentation at college day. It really was great. I was particularly impressed by how you were able to get to the heart of the matter in such a short time! That is a skill I really need to master.”

I believe my work as a coach needs to reach a different generation insha’Allah……

*names changed from their original

Bismillah

“For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin–real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”

I came across this quote and found that it echoed some of my own thoughts I’ve had the past few months. As I was contemplating the reasons why many of us are in a state of perpetual unhappiness or dissatisfaction, I began to think about how our expectations of this life are at the root of much of our misery. 

The quote says it perfectly: people are always waiting for the right moment to be happy, to fully feel alive, to live life to its fullest.

We are waiting for something else to happen so we can then  say “ah, now this is the  life I have been waiting for.”  But what is the cost of thinking like this? The cost are a range of emotions such as anxiety, worry, frustration, disappointment, resentment, and sadness. To focus on what “could be” allows us to delete all of the beautiful and amazing things that already exist.

Live in the now!You’ve heard this statement before, and as always, the greatest wisdom is the simplest.  I have heard many women say ”I can’t wait until I reach 40, because they say you won’t care as much about all the little things in life, but you will be able to focus more on what is important.” Elders often say, when asked what they would change looking back at life,  “I would have spent more time with my kids just playing, more time watching sunsets, forgave more easily, and more time absorbing all the moments of my life that were there, instead of chasing after the bigger and better.”

Why wait? Happiness is not something that is going to come. It is always present, and begs to be discovered everyday in your life. Happiness is hidden in the little things. The puffy white clouds in the sky, a friend who you can relax with, the taste of a sweet apple, a moment of clarity, sinking into your favorite chair, a funny email, discovering matching socks folded together, and the giggle of children.  No grand vacation, huge house, luxury sedan, or size 4 waist will help you notice the moments that make up a life of true living.

To top it all off, the most essential ingredient to happiness is to live a life that fulfills your Divine purpose: to worship Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala.

Ibn AlQayyim said

 ”Truly in the heart there is a sadness that can not be removed except with the happiness of knowing Allah and being true to Him. And in it there is an emptiness that can not be filled except with love for Him and by turning to him and always remembering Him. And if a person were given all of the world and what is in it, it would not fill this emptiness.”

Get Happiness Now:

1) Ask yourself “What is one step I can take to get closer to Allah today?

2) Then Ask Yourself “What are 5 things I am grateful for in my life today?”

3) Imagine: If you were to take a vacation with those you love – what feeling are you seeking after the most? Now: Give yourself permission to make those feelings happen today instead. For example, I might say “I want to take a weekend trip with my kids to I can just focus on them without distractions and we can have quality time together.” Instead, I will focus on making “vacation” hour today, and see where it leads us…..

The old saying stands true “When life give you lemons, make lemonade!”

My personal quote these days.. “When life gives you a mountain of laundry, let the kids climb! Hey, at least I am encouraging their creative side. Little stuffed animals could make ”caves” in the mountain….and sleep there….and you know, sometimes for days… shh. Don’t disturb the sleeping lion….